“You should have been here yesterday” will be what you hear from other fishermen.
Last evening Hawkeye had a wonderful dream; He dreamt that he was on the surface of the “Planet Mars” looking upwards in amazement at the Space Vehicle, “Curiosity” as it both attempted, and succeeded in its unbelievable Mission to the Chilly Planet. It seemed fun until that one ton space automobile landed on him causing him to gasp for air.
Upon awakening, Hawkeye asked Sweet Leanor.”Why is there Air?” [Thus Hawkeyes Stupid Question of the week!]
Hawkeye was contributing his fair share of stomping out “Global Warming” the other evening. He was having a big “New York Cut” of Beefsteak! Leanor, upon serving Hawkeye the tasty morsel asked; “What can a floppy old piece of meat have to do with stomping out “Global Warming?”
Well, said Hawkeye, Albert Gore said that the Ozone Layer gets screwed up from all of those cows Flatulating, [Farting] all at once.
He said that we should continue to eat Beef for as long as our cholesterol levels will permit! This will prolong the dwindling [Melting] of the “Ice Caps.” Al also went on to say that he believes that what caused the hole in the ozone layer allowing all of those gamma rays through is the fact that we have siphoned off all of the pollutants that have been accumulating all throughout the Millions of years, beginning with the Farting [Flatulating] of Neanderthal, followed closely by early politicians…Humm.
Hawkeye heard somewhere that there will be a sequel to the “Six Million Dollar Man” appearing soon to a cable network close to you. It is rumored that the title of the sequel will be: “The Ten Cent Junkie!” [Starring Clark Gabley].
The election campaigns are heating up in the Mainland USA fans. There has been a few interruptions however, in the form of murderous rampages spawned by Hate Groups and offensive Racist Groups. This s&#t should rightly have been buried with Adolf Hitler, and Rin Tin Tin! Hawkeye watched as the imbecile that shot Congressperson Gabriel Gifford’s out there in Tucson Arizona pled guilty to 18 counts of whatever. Dauhh.. Why did it take a court to convince us that this guy was guilty? After all, he performed his unpatriotic, racist, terrorist, murderous, demeaning act right in broad daylight for all to see. It is clear that this guy had a death wish, and was hoping that he could kill and maim as many of his fellow Homo-sapiens as he could before a policeman finally took aim and dropped his rotten ass! Our system of justice must toughen up on these unbelievable murdering Homos that think they can take the law in to their own hands by killing off the American Populous. We need to replace bleeding heart members of our judicial system with those who are intent upon upholding de law! The days of old, are over fans. The days of the Wild West are behind us. We are now facing an altogether different enemy: “Ourselves!”
It is time that we all gathered by the river, joined hands, and supported a new system of living amongst one another. We gotta come together and love one another, care for one another, and last but not least, hug one another instead of Killing and or maiming our fellow man! When Jesus comes back for the fifth time, he is gonna be real pissed! There is no way that he is going to be tolerant of what he sees this time around…Over.
There was a sort of retarded Homo-sapien came running up to Hawkeye in “Da Hood” one evening last week. He asked Hawkeye what the Government intended to do with Two Derelict Barges and a “Gold Plated Excavator.”
He was also inquiring as to what created the need for another Antique Tug Boat. The seemingly intelligent, and somewhat knowing individual also said that he thinks that the Tug and Barges were bought from a company that is owned, or partly owned by The Shipyard that is suing the Hooterville Government. Hawkeye told this guy that if he had all of this knowledge oozing out of his face that he should by all means ooze it in a direction that would do the most good.. Humm. The guy scratched certain areas of his anatomy and continued his “Trudge” to his “Hooch!”
Now; could someone please tell Hawkeye why we really lost the Fox News Channel? This is one hell of a time to take a right wing media off the air. We all pay through the nose to our cable provider, and it seems as though Fox News knows nothing of a rate hike in Hooterville, so what gives? The only other Cable Media available is the left leaning news media, which does nothing to provide the true picture coming from the right wing. This is sort of Bias as Hawkeye sees it, and if this is not the case will all, or any of you go to Hawkeye on line and comment?
Until Next week, it’s all about CBS & Huffington Post!
With Love, Hawk & Leanor
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